Next Gen Dad

Five Years of Wonderful

Five years ago yesterday I married my best friend!

For our five year anniversary I surprised MyLove with a trip to Santa Ynez. We stayed in a quaint B&B called Meadowlark Inn and went wine tasting for the first time. Both of us thought it crazy that we have lived in Santa Barbara so long and never gone wine tasting.

When we arrived I was a bit disappointed because the B&B was not what I expected. I was expecting something a bit nicer, but the old adage “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” definitely applied. Upon arriving, the inn keeper welcomed us by name and was so friendly we immediately felt at home. We stayed in the Cabernet suite, which has a funny hot tub on the patio (check out the video). There was a mix up with our wine tour schedule where I thought it was Saturday, but it was Friday. The tour started at 11:00 but we were not able to get there till about 1:30. The staff was super accommodating, and adjusted our wine tour to start at 2:00 by picking us up half way through the tour and then took just the two of us for another two hours to complete the tour.

The best part about the tour is that the inn owner does the tour personally. We were told that she was a former restaurant owner, so she new all of the places to go that had great wine versus just popular wineries. To our delight, our tour guide was Brigitte (pronounced bri-gee-ta) of Brigitte’s restaurant fame in Santa Barbara (now Opal). We heard wonderful stories of her move to the United States from Germany and how she has been involved in starting multiple restaurants in Santa Barbara (Brigitte's, Downey’s, and Norbert's).

My favorite tasting room was Artiste, which is a tasting room and art gallery. The featured artist’s medium was wine! MyLove and I both thought it was so interesting. All the wine labels are featured artists, and the name of that wine is the name of the painting.

At the last winery which was my favorite, Rusack, we just sipped wine and talked with Brigitte about the restaurant industry. The winery manager finally had to come and kick us out because they were closing.

What really made our stay, other than it being with my best friend, was that we were treated like family. It is not the nicest B&B I have stayed at, but it is definitely my favorite experience at any B&B. Brigitte and her staff staged a great experience that we will forever correlate with wonderful memories. As a business owner Brigitte really understands that hospitality is about staging a memorable experience for the guest.

We definitely plan on doing future wine tours with Brigitte, and hopefully she will be a future client of kevin sturm Consulting as she is going to open a restaurant at her other B&B Story Book Inn.

If you would like to contact Brigitte directly to inquire about a customized wine tour you can reach her at info@meadowlarkinnsolvang.com.

Life Changes...

Just when you begin to feel comfortable, life seems to want to change all at once. I've spent some time over the past couple months reviewing changes in my life, and it makes me question where these changes will ultimately lead. I'm not intending to sound deep, it just makes me think about life decisions. I don't believe these changes or my life are any more or less significant than anyone elses, but they seem to be extra significant right now.

My son turned one year old last month...which is bigger than you think for a parent
Two months ago I was informed I was being removed from the job I held for four years (and that I liked)
I was then offered a new job with the same company...and accepted it
One month later I rejected the job offer (this last Friday) and accepted a different job in the same company
My little sister had a baby (obviously she is not so little anymore) which is hard to believe
Found out two days ago that my dad has cancer

All of these changes affect me and my family in different ways: some good, some bad - but they have an affect. I think the biggest thing these changes have made me reflect on is the reliance on Christ that I am forced to have. I am a "make my own way" type of person, but that isn't God's plan. Daily I have to recognize that my life is not my own, but the choices that I make and how I chose to let changes in my life affect me are. My friend Matt Richter put it well when he summarized an evening Bible study with, "We are to pursue righteousness in our choices." Our choices should be focused around the eternal, rather than the immediate grafication of our own desires.

I know that life will continue to bring changes - which lead to choices. I hope that I can accutely listen for Christ and make the right choice.

This Daddy

This daddy is a self proclaimed Next Generation Dad. But when you make up the phrase you can self proclaim just about anything. I have also just proclaimed myself King of Daddyland, which makes MamaLita royalty, Bubba a prince, and Mimi a princess. Just like in a Disney movie!

On that note I probably should buy Disney stock because I'm pretty confident I am single handedly increasing the stock value, and we haven't even made the trip to the most-crowded-overpriced-ensuring-it-under-delivers-on-most-parent's-expectations-place-on-Earth.

Now you are probably asking yourself what is an NGD?

An NGD is a dad that believes, and daily lives out, that raising kids is an equal partnership and joint effort between a mom and dad — with a reasonable exception for birthing and breast feeding. Next Generation Dads know raising the next generation of men and women is the most important, rewarding, and life changing job you could be offered, even though you are usually under qualified, often ill prepared, and generally over confident (it may just be me that was over confident, but I think over confidence is more common to dads than moms).

To do it really well means dedicating the greatest percentage of your time, energy, and life to the task.

Being a husband and a dad was the one thing I always knew I wanted. I had plans on what I would do for a "job" (which ultimately turned out very different than the plan). But having a family was a constant. I think this desire was because of the family life I had growing up. I thought it was normal to have your parents really love each other, to have both sets of grandparents spend holidays together, and to think divorce was weird.

Thanks to the "job" I didn't plan to have I met MamaLita in Dallas, TX. Three years later Bubba joined the troop and three years after that Mimi arrived.

I am a very proud, occasionally frustrated, often tired, and extremely passionate daddy. I love my kids and can't wait to have more. As a side note we will adopt all future siblings, something MamaLita and I are passionate about. There are too many tikes in this world without parents to love, hug, and kiss on (I always just want to eat mine...seriously); and being a daddy means more than just having someone who has half my chromosomal anomalies (poor Bubba).

After Bubba and before Mimi I quit my "job" and got a life. I still have job, but now I refer to myself as a Lifestyle Entrepeneur. The freedom to work from home and work when and how I want means I get to spend loads of time being a daddy. The hardest part is trying to explain to Bubba why I can't, "Play with me!" when I am working. We are not getting rich by the world's standards, but I am getting rich based on the NGD standard. I can honestly say I love what I do, which is rare I think.

If you are a Cubicle-Cave-Dweller or C-Level-Lifer and want to make the leap to Lifestyle Entrepreneur I highly recommend it. You can go here, here, here, here ,and here for some encouragement and real life help on how.

So, in addition to being a daddy I am an entrepreneur, regular blogger, public speaker, information sharer, avid reader, TV watcher (too much probably), average athlete, lover of life and people, and pursuer of a relationship with Jesus (the Christ one not the Mexican down the street). I think it is important to do well in life, but know it is much more important to do good! I know that God has blessed me richly, and desire to share those blessings.

I am a technology evangelist and love that technology will continue to change the world at a increasing pace. I love gadgets, and if you meet me it is apparent based on the slew of them in my laptop bag. But, I also believe the need for technology and immediate information has created a modern society where self introspection and time for quite thought is of less importance than it should be. New and good ideas are generated from taking time to notice the world around us, and then thinking clearly in order to discuss and take action on ways to improve it - both technically and socially.

Aside from spending time with my family, friends, and business I am passionate about the concept and reality of social entrepreneurship and micro-finance lending. I have been blessed with love, success, confidence, and the opportunity to access almost every convenience in life. My goal is in turn to help others have access to these same blessings. Over half the world's population live in extreme poverty earning less than $2.00 a day. My generation, our generation, is the first to be able to say we can realistically see the end to extreme poverty. I can think of no greater calling to use our resources to spread God's love and help to serve those in need.

You can check out my company here and here, more about my thoughts on business life here., and MamaLita's blog here.

If you would like to contribute a guest post to NGD or just ask me questions email me.

If you read this whole thing I'm impressed and hope that you like some of my ramblings on daddy-hood.